Bring In the Media

Last night we received the news that our Phase 1 funding had just been submitted and approved and we have officially set sail on the adoption ship!  We were informed that our next contact will be with the media team and they will provide us with the list of questions and information needed to get started on building our websites. 

Looks like we're officially underway!

We're Moving Right Along!

We were finally able to submit all of our loan documents to the credit union last night - what a time intensive excercise that was!  Chris had been working on them for a couple of weeks already, but last night we sat down for 3 hours just to finish them all up!  It was A LOT of information, a lot of paperwork and legally binding signatures (lol), but all that matters is that it's officially done!  We should have all the funds in the bank by the end of the week!  This means that the marketing team should be contacting us as early as next week to spend time creating our webpages together (that the birthmothers will look at) in hopes of grabbing someone's attention and being matched as soon as possible!

In the meantime, we are busy coming up with ideas for the nursery, acquiring all the necessary baby "gear" (furniture, stroller, car seat, etc), and registering for baby showers!  FINALLY we get to actually feel excited about the opportunity of bringing our baby home!  It's been a long time coming . . .

Additionally, I shared the news of our adoption with my boss yesterday.  I was SUPER nervous about the timing of this news, but very relieved when he seemed genuinely happy and excited for us.  He asked some basic factual questions and ended with a dialogue around the timeline.  I told him it could be anywhere from 2-6 months and that I would be on maternity leave for at least the full 12 weeks given (through the Bank).  Other discussions will be had in the future about how to cover my role while out, but at least he knows now and I don't feel like I'm carrying around this secret anymore!  I figured, given the uncertainty of a timeframe, the most advanced notice I could possibly give him would be the best option.  So, a huge relief for me!

NC Background Checks

Yesterday we got our state background checks back - everything's clear and we are good to go!  Still waiting on the FBI checks but hopefully the turnaround time on those won't be too long.  We are chugging right along with our homestudy "stuff".

We're in a holding pattern with the loan docs at the moment but hopefully we'll get all of that stuff completed and finalized by end of next week and we can move right along to the next phase of the process - marketing!

The Harell's vs. The Cabarrus County Sherriff's Department

Okay, so I knew to expect a certain level of frustration along the way, but today's experience (so far) takes the cake!  Today we had set aside some time to obtain our background checks and fingerprint cards from the local police station.  Already, it's a pretty crappy day.  It's pouring down rain and neither of us feel inclined to leave the comforts of our office / home to visit the local government officials.  However, in hopes of keeping the momentum going, we braved the rain anyway.  I had spent some time on the phone with our homestudy agency earlier today just to clarify what it was EXACTLY that we were supposed to accomplish on our little fieldtrip downtown.  Our homestudy rep, Anne, told me that we needed to acquire 2 copies of our state background checks, FBI background checks, and fingerprint cards.  Included in the original packet of information she had sent over a few weeks ago were the applications for both the state and federal background checks.  So it appeared we had what we needed there to begin compiling the 2 packets of information required by the state and FBI.  On our way to the police department, as I'm reviewing the applications with Chris in the car, we read that both background check applications will require payment in the form of a money order or certified check.  Great!  Now, in the pouring down rain, we have to make a pit stop at the bank to obtain 4 money orders (oh, and btw, the fingerprinting area of the police department closes at 4pm on Friday's and it is now 3:23pm).  As we are sitting in the bank parking lot getting ready to go in, we review what it is exactly that we need to ask for once in the building.  There was a lot of confusion about the number of money orders we would be requesting, so Chris placed yet another call to Anne for further clarification.  Once everthing was clear, we walk into the bank and FORTUNATELY there was no line to wait in!  So we were in and out in 10 minutes with all the certified money orders we needed to move right along.  We head straight over to the police department where they inform us that they don't do fingerprinting on Friday's.  Next thing I know, the words "no, i called and spoke with someone this morning" come rolling off my lips in a completely intolerable tone!  (At this point, I really am rather frustrated with this whole charade!)  I am told that I must have spoken with someone at the Sherriff's department and that I would need to drive over there in order to get my fingerprints taken today.  UGH!  So off we go.  When we get to the correct building, we take the elevator up to the "records department" floor during which Chris gently reminds me that my expectations for customer service should be low from this point forward.  And boy was he right!  The lady that was assigned to us was a down right terror!  She couldn't have been more rude or condescending if she tried any harder.  I felt like screaming out "this is for an adoption, lady!  I'm trying to do some good here!!!"  After barely giving us the attention/guidance we deserved for this request, she handed us 2 forms to complete.  She asked us for the name and address of our agency but never indicated why she needed that information.  So we go about filling out our applications with the basic identifying information (name, address, phone number, business name & contact information, etc.).  We happily turn it back in to her (as it finally feels like we're getting somewhere in the process) to which she takes one glance at the paperwork and says "Mr. Stephen Harrell, remember when I asked you for the name and address of the agency?"  Insinuating, of course, that "business name and information" on the application implied that of the agency, not our employment information.  The entire application asked specific questions about us personally, so naturally, BOTH of us thought that "business name and contact info" meant "name and address of where you work".  So she returned our applications to us to be filled out "correctly".  FINALLY all the preliminary crap stuff was over and we were approved for the next step towards obtaining our fingerprint cards.  But it took everything inside me not to say "would it have been so hard for you to tell us that that is why you asked us for our agency information?  Because perhaps it isn't self-explanatory on the application?  Or maybe I should remind you that it's your job to be of service to the tax-paying citizens of Cabarrus County???  But I digress . . .

The good news is, we now are in possession of: 4 fingerprint cards (2/ea), 2 executed state background check applications, 2 executed FBI background check applications, and 4 money orders. Now, all we need to do is create 2 packets (1 for the State and 1 for the Fed) and mail them off!  Good-freakin'-grief!!!

We're Approved!!!

As you are aware, we mailed in our application packet on Tuesday (7/19).  Included in that packet was a financial application requesting to borrow $40,000 from their lending partners to help finance this adoption.  To our huge surprise, we received a phone call today informing us that we were approved for $35,000 of that inital $40,000 request!!!  What a ginaormous answer to prayer that is!!!  This means a lot of things, but mostly, it means that we have zero reasons for further delay in bringing home baby Harrell.  We have set out on this journey and there is nothing holding us back anymore.  We will still do all that we can to help raise that money (because inevitably we still have to pay it all back with interest), but there is security in knowing that the bulk of this adoption is already financed and we have the freedom to move along with the process quickly.

We're coming to get you baby Harrell, getting closer everyday!

It's Only Just Begun

We mailed in our paperwork today!!!  We are officially on the adoption train!  It took us a little bit longer to complete the application than expected, there were some seriously difficult questions to asnwer!  But we feel comfortable with the choices we've made and we are 1 step closer to meeting our child :)  From here, we are waiting on approval for the financing we've requested through ANLC.  Once we are approved (within 72 hours of receiving the application) we can move forward with the homestudy and marketing efforts.  The great thing is that all 3 components work in tandem so we're not waiting for 1 thing to finish before we can start another.  I feel like this HUGE weight has been lifted now that everything is officially underway.  No more researching, no more deliberating, no more waiting!  We are ready to bring our little one home :)

One Step Closer . . .

Okay, so after my last post about choosing the right agency to move forward with, we took a step back and re-evaluated some things.  We spent some time gathering information and reviewing all the details for each agency we have inquired about thus far and basically came to the decision that we didn't feel comfortable with any of them (a devastating blow at the time!).  So, once again, back to the Google search I went in hopes to find one glimmer of hope that I breezed over in my previous searches that would be relevant to us now.  Upon such efforts I stumbled upon a website for a company that offers legal adoption services nationwide called Adoption Network Law Center.  Immediately I read through the entire website and loved everything about it - but having never heard of it before, I was very cautious as to whether or not it was even legit.  But to our benefit, it turns out that it is a very reputable law center throughout the country and is highly successful at what they do.  Certainly a great start so far!  So I immediately contacted them via email for more information to which they quickly followed back up with a phone call.  We were pre-screened in that inital call and scheduled for a preliminary consultation with our designated adoption coordinator on June 8th (last night).  So we spent just over an hour going through the adoption process with them from beginning to end.  We reviewed all fees required and they were very thorough and comprehensive in their presentation to us.  In a nutshell, here are the details of pursuing adoption through ANLS:

• They spend over $1m annually on marketing to birthmothers nationwide thus resulting in over 300 newborn placements a year
• After working with our adoption coordinator to setup all marketing on our behalf (4 websites, YouTube video profiles, and brochures), the average wait time to be placed is within 4 months!
• The fees are fixed (minus certain things such as travel expenses) and regulated per state laws.  They also offer financing through their company so that money is not a reason why hopeful adoptive couples are unable to achieve their dream of starting a family.
• They offer a staff that is on call for both birthmothers and adoptive parents 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
• They require prospective birthmothers to undergo an extensive pre-screening process in order to rule out any "undesirable" candidates (such as those who are looking to take advantage of medical and or social leniancies during their pregnancy or others whose intentions are fraudulous - ie. never pregnant but looking to solicit money instead).
• Our part of the adoption process is completed in less than 3 months with very little paperwork involved.  Since they are a legal firm, not an adoption agency, they handle all the paperwork on our behalf.  We will submit two 7-8 page documents alone and that's it.  All our mktg is complete within the first 2 weeks, our homestudy is complete in 6-8 weeks, and then we wait for the phone call from our Adoption Coordinator saying we have a baby!
• ANLC represents the adoptive parents, NOT the birthmothers, which works well in our favor. 

From start to end, choosing ANLC will require more of us financially, but we have the assurance of knowing the process is legally binding and finalized according to state laws, we will be placed with a newborn in a matter of mere months rather than years, and we have a much larger pool of birthmothers to choose from (which would allow us to be more selective if we choose to) and still be placed within a reasonable amount of time.  Overall, we felt great about this "agency" and have scheduled a follow-up meeting in 2 weeks to move forward with the process.  Nothing is finalized yet, but we both feel equally comfortable about proceeding with ANLC, should we choose to continue down this path.

Note the caviat in that last statement . . . "should we choose to continue down this path."  I say this because it has recently come to my attention that my beloved husband would like to pursue embryo adoption as well.  This conversation came up very randomnly earlier this week and it was clear that Chris wanted to pursue this option just as much as ANLC.  In case you aren't familar with this type of adoption, allow me to explain.  When a couple goes through IVF, there are typically several embryos left over that requires the couple to either freeze them for future use or discard them (which, in essence, is a form of abortion as embryos are considered to be a human life form).  For those couples who are successful with IVF and choose not to use their remaining embryos, they have the option to donate them to an adoption agency instead.  For us, the adoptive parents, this will allow us to experience the best of both worlds - adoption AND pregnancy.  Per my research, there is only 1 agency in NC that offers embryo adoption, however, we were very pleasantly surprised to find out that our very own team of infertility doctors and nurses at CMC Womens Institute also offers this program as well!!!!  OBVIOUSLY there are some great results from that!  Having been with this team for 3 years now, they are fully aware of our medical history and are invested in us personally. Not to mention that it will potentially be covered by our medical insurance.  Additionally, the adoptive parents are in control over choosing the birthparent couple based on profiles presented to us that we can thumb through and choose appropriately per our standards.  Because this program is offered as a service through a medical facility, it cuts out the middle man of an adoption agency, therefore also cutting down significantly on expenses and time.  And last but not least, in the state of NC, all children born are legally bound to their birthmother (ie, the woman who delivered them in the hospital), which, in this case would be me; therefore, there is no wasted time or money after the baby is born on finalizing the adoption b/c the baby is legally recognized as our "biological child" upon delivery.  So it definitely sounds like a good opportunity to pursue as well.  We are scheduled to meet with Dr. Usadi on July 5th at 9am to discuss this opportunity and our candidacy.

We are DEFINITELY one step closer to finalizing our adoption plan, but as you can see, we still have at least one major decision to make.

Debut of the Harrell Adoption Notebook!

It is understood that after you've met me one time you comprehend just how much of an organized, type-A personality that I am. I am sure that God made me this way for a purpose! He knew that it would help tremendously during our adoption process. So, in order to gear up for the mounds of paperwork we are slowly beginning to receive, I have created the Harrell Adoption Notebook. The one-stop shopping to all things Harrell adoption (if you will) :)

Front Cover

Inside Flap: ID card and Pocket folder which contains all the agency DVD's and pamphlets we're receiving.

Spiral-bound notebook to keep all our handwritten notes from seminars and conferences together with the rest of our adoption information

First Tab: Agency information and applications

The remaining tabs will be comprised of financial information, copies of all paperwork we complete and submit, letters of encouragement and support, etc.